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Another tactic, one for which became particularly famous, was the art of “negging”—that is, giving a woman a semi-insulting compliment so that you a) distinguish yourself from the pack of people she’s accustomed to have hitting on her, and b) slightly lower her self-esteem to the point that she wants your approval and is vulnerable to your advances. I was surprised when I first read  that in addition to being a sort of how-to manual for picking up women, it’s kind of a Neil Strauss coming-of-age story. Gilsinan: If I read it right, you start out scared to talk to women, you learn all these techniques and score a lot, and then, to spoil it, you meet this woman for whom none of it works and you fall in love and swear off your player ways. I think more people have heard about than have actually read it.This is a subtle thing, and it’s not the same as being bluntly mean. If, however, you say something like, “Those shoes look really comfortable,” you may have started a conversation, even if the response is, “They’re not. ”That’s how I ultimately read the book—the tactics were about starting conversations with people you had no business talking to. Tinder has happened, Strauss is older, and he knows not all of the book ages well; he now calls some of the techniques he documented—and used—“objectifying and horrifying.” He’s married to a woman he loves very much, for which his pickup-artist friends of yesteryear might accuse him of having a case of “one-itis.” For was also a numbers game: Hit on enough women and eventually one of them was bound to succumb to your advances. I don’t think I’ve gotten any angry emails from people who’ve read it, per se. Strauss: Obviously I was a journalist, this community [of pickup artists] already existed, and I went in to describe my experience of it.I'm looking forward to reading all of your comments on the community pages in my members section, in my guestbook, or in my email. PLEASE NOTE: I do not use material from readers in any of my books, so I will not be able to consider any suggestions you have about future books.
If you ask me today about it, I’d tell you that anything that involves manipulation or needing to have a certain outcome is definitely not healthy in any way. And I thought, how can I break the heart of, how could I hurt somebody who loves me and be so selfish? And she said, “Well no wonder you can’t be in a relationship.” And I said, “Why? And you have this realization where you’re like, no wait, that’s my personality.Currently, I have five series: Dark Series, Ghost Walkers, Drake Sister Series, Sisters of the Heart Sisters, & Leopard Series.I also have several Christmas Stories and single titles in print.The mobile-friendly version of this site is now active!So is the mobile-friendly version of our community.
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