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I am fearful the Christian community has irresponsibly coerced men and women into marriage through cultural pressure. If you aren’t ready for marriage, or if you do not want to get married, you are not sinning.It means dating someone who meets the values and goals you have for a future spouse (more on that later). Casual or purposeless dating has no benefit for Christians. We are designed to know why we do stuff and where we are going. Now, please, please, please don’t be a freakish weirdo. It involves sharing personal struggles and vulnerability. If you believe God is preparing you for foreign missions, is it important the person you marry shares this passion? If you love the Cowboys and your future spouse loves the Packers, is it important to work through this before marriage? Look at Solomon: the Bible says his wives turned him towards other false Gods and idols.So even the wise King Solomon made some mistakes in this regard, and it caused him to turn from God. ” Can you imagine how constantly hearing this question from friends, family, and unsuspecting old ladies makes some singles believe they have a problem? When you date, allow the community of people around to speak into your relationship. Your friends are able to see inconsistencies and problems you can’t because they are outside the storm. If you are confident God called you to marry, he will deliver. There must be a secret bylaw passed down from the early church fathers, but once you reach the age of 25 you will be asked the question almost weekly…”When are you getting married?
The first instance in the Bible where God is not pleased comes when God sees Adam living in the Garden of Eden alone (Gen. Singleness can be a gift from God, but don’t use it as an excuse to be lazy. And to my church’s credit, they drilled this one point home constantly. Dating and marriage are not for those who rely on another person for joy, peace, and purpose. The Bible (and Jewish tradition) did allow for marriage between a believer and outsider, but only if the outsider converted. Otherwise, they were (and still are) commanded not to marry non-Christians/unbelievers.It is important to keep in mind that when a believer marries a non-believer, it can lead the Christian astray.And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband.
You might get into a relationship with someone who loves Jesus, meets the values you have in a future spouse, and is compatible with you. Just end the relationship, and continue to seek the Lord. Again, please don’t be a freakish weirdo and give Christians a negative label. My wife loves the Lord, and I can say with all certainty I wouldn’t be following Jesus without her. It’s dangerous riding on the road to marriage without an idea of where you are going. Don’t sit someone down on the first date and interview them to make sure they meet all of the qualities.